Some years ago I tried to explain to my daughter that I was weekly cleaning out the shower drain after her rampage about the hair in the drain. About 10 times I tried. Then I stopped and every time she would complain I would smile and walk away except for that one time.
"I know but we will get back on that as soon as your have your own shower drain to clean! Oke" Let me tell you she was not happy and I tried to explain to her but it seemed to me that she and sometimes her dad did not seem to think I did very much in our home. The only time I ever got a positive comment was when they saw me do housekeeping chores in the weekends when they where not working or in school.
I am lucky enough to be able to be patient and not let them get to me. I know my own truth and I knew my time would come.
So now she's off to college and has her own space but shares her bathroom and her shower with another girl.
"O my god Mom I really need to say sorry. It was terrible. I did not clean my shower drain for a month and yesterday the water would not run done the drain. It was really really Jak." See told me "The hair, the slimy goo. It was gross. I had to pull it off with my fingers and I almost had to throw up." You could see that that had not been a nice experience.
"I am so sorry for all the times I was complaining about our shower drain that never ever came close to what I had to clean up." She gave me a hug and I whispered: "Next time listen when I try to explain something to you, oke? It's alright we are all here to learn now you know. Thanks for you apologie!" and then I told her buy a toothbrush just for cleaning, it will help to get the goo out without using your fingers!"
Suddenly I realized my little girl is a grown woman with a life off her own with that little girl still hidden somewhere inside off her and I love them both!