The day it all changed
Imagine... Everyone thinks you are a fun, spontaneous, sociable and extrovert person. You appreciate the attention that others give you, you are open to new people and want to keep talking all day long or what you like most, what you do, what you are good at. In addition, you are also very interested in the other. You want to know where someone comes from, what someone does in his/her spare time, what characterizes that person and how you will make a long-lasting friendship with that person in no time. In short, you want contacts, get to know new people, make friends, and so on.
You develop yourself, go from school to school and get to know yourself better. You look at yourself differently. Suddenly it looks like you've changed. Changed from a fun, spontaneous, sociable and extrovert person, to a very introvert, shy, modest and insecure person. Of course, it will still be the way you were, but inside it feels different. You feel insecure, uncomfortable and attach more importance to what others think and think of you. There's nothing that can tell you where this came from. Suddenly you feel extremely uncomfortable and stressful in social situations. Dealing with people is more difficult, it is more difficult to establish new contacts and suddenly you seem to want to fall to the ground every time others speak to you, talk to you or ask questions to you. You look at the person opposite you and think: 'What will he/she think of me? Would he/she think I'm stupid? That I don't look or that I say crazy things?”
Where did this come from?
After endless searching on the Internet, I had found an answer for myself. A social #angststoornis . A process had begun in the search of countless websites on this subject, a word I do not take for granted. A SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDER. After endless deliberations, at one point I would have dared to take the step to talk about this with a psychologist. My suspicions were confirmed. What did this mean? Does this mean I'm afraid of people? Does this mean that I can never function normally again in social situations? Every time, when I talk to people, I feel my heart rate increases, my blood pressure rises, I get warmer, and my hands start to tremble irritantly. Is this ever gonna pass? Or am I gonna keep this bothering my whole life? These are all kinds of questions that remain unanswered for the time being.
At this moment, when I look to the future, I try to create as good and positive a picture for myself as possible. I've been on my way for a number of years...