Sarah Ben Avraham

· 12 Jul 2021

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Self-control...

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Are you ready to control your anger? To get started, consider these 10 anger management tips.

1. Think Before You Talk
In a moment of anger, it's easy to say something you'll regret later. Take a few moments to sort your thoughts before you say anything, and allow other people involved in the situation to do the same.

2. Once you calm down, express your anger
As soon as you can think clearly, express your frustration in an assertive but not confrontative way. Communicate your concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or trying to control them.

3. Get a little exercise
Physical activity can reduce the stress that can cause you anger. If you feel your anger increases, go for a jog or walk vigorously, or spend some time doing physical activities that you enjoy.

4. Take time to reflect
The times for reflection aren't just for children. Take short breaks at times of day that tend to be stressful. Some moments of peace of mind can help you feel better prepared to handle what will happen next without getting irritated or angry.

5. Identify possible solutions
Instead of focusing on what made you angry, strive to solve the problem in question. Does it make you crazy that your child's room is messy? Close the door. Is your partner late for dinner every night? Schedule meals later in the evening or agree to eat only a few times a week. Remember that anger doesn't solve anything and it could only make everything worse.

6. Use first-person statements
To avoid criticizing or blaming, which could only increase tension, use first-person statements to describe the problem. Be respectful and specific. For example, say, “I'm upset that you left the table without offering to help with the dishes” instead of “You never do household chores”.

7. Don't hold a grudge
Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and other negative feelings to replace positive ones, you may notice that your own bitterness or sense of injustice overwhelm you. But if you can forgive someone who angered you, they could both learn from the situation and strengthen your relationship.

8. Use humor to relieve tension
Taking things easy can help relieve tension. Use humor to help you deal with what makes you angry and possibly the unrealistic expectations you have about what things should be like. However, avoid sarcasm because it can hurt feelings and make things worse.

9. Practice relaxation techniques
When you're feeling exasperated, put relaxation techniques into practice. Practice deep breathing exercises, imagine a relaxing scene, or repeat a word or phrase that calms you down, such as “Take it easy”. You can also listen to music, write a diary or practice some yoga poses — whatever it takes to relax.

10. Find out when to look for help
Sometimes learning how to control anger is a challenge for everyone. If your anger seems out of control, it forces you to do things that you regret or hurt those around you.