Dear readers,
Unfortunately, “the transition” is still heavily underestimated, laughed, annoyed and simply not understood.
That's why I wish your story
the word; UNDERSTANDING bold will underline.
And, of course, I wish that it can be of great support.
You certainly are not alone and sharing, yes sharing also shares pain.
Thank you for your candor brave dodo xxx
The 8 job.
('Healthy' in the transition)
Control seems lost,
I don't have it in my hand anymore.
My life has really ended up in an 8 job.
I feel lousy,
my head is buzzing and a feeling of pressure controls my day.
I long for peace, for overview, for my own life in which I can function again.
Four imaginary elastics snatch me
completely from my familiar place.
Front to back, left to right,
man i'm going crazy slowly.
Every time I just scribbled back to my own self,
jerks one of those spikes so that I don't recognize myself again.
Really it's almost impossible to describe.
How long do I have to stay in that transition?
I look like a centipede!
I'm trying to keep all the balls high,
but I don't finish anything.
I feel old, my hair doesn't want,
I'm yelling for everything,
I feel insecure and feeling wacky.
I feel like a “lived out” elderly woman!
My muscles hurt, I sweat out of my bed and then I feel cold again.
I'm annoyed by my own children,
why does' no one 'understand how I feel.
Is there no one who knows what I mean?
I'm convinced there's nothing
is going on, I'm not afraid.
I'm not sick, I'm not dying,
I'm just 'just' in that stupid transition
I still have a lot to do at home and
I'm looking for order in my head.
I need to get started,
but I feel so numb.
Sometimes I feel pathetic and very negative.
My walk in the store is very often impulsive.
Shopping,
pfffffffff it's because it has to.
And again I buy too much,
I never do it right either.
Again I'm running after the facts,
it's already late and I still have to cook.
When a mirror wall steals my attention,
I see “Ma Flodder” as my image.
I am shocked by my own display
and get a cry as a reward.
Deep in my soul,
i had a whole day but didn't make time for myself.
It's one big annoyance and I can't avoid the “perpetrator “
Very slowly, little by little he's demolishing me.
It's so weird, my life is good
and I am very grateful for everything God has given.
Then why do I feel so bad
and even think about death while I'm still allowed to live.
Why am I walking in this forest with too many trees?
After all, I have everything I've ever dared to dream.
I have everything, I'm even 'healthy'.
And yet I'm living with a torment,
it draws me more and more to the abyss.
Always just in time,
the elastic pulls me back to my center of peace.
Positive again my flames are extinguished again.
My cabbage will glow again
to be able to provide warmth.
And I, I give thankful for life.
Then I can enjoy my family and my own existence again.
I thank the Lord for that, He has come with me.
He is my support, even during this difficult time.
He gives me victory in this hormonal battle.
“HEALTHY” in the transition,
do you have any idea how that goes?
Well, it's like post-natal depression,

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