
Shut down ❤
Anieka's pregnancy did not go at all as I had hoped. Soon my blood pressure rose, and by 30 weeks she stopped growing. I had a hard time with her in my belly, but most importantly, my little baby girl was having a hard time.
At 33 weeks in the hospital, at 35 weeks she was born - my body was giving up.
Her first weeks in the world she had to do without her mother's warmth: for two weeks I only saw her one hour a day.
Anieka Catelijne has nothing to do with it, fortunately. She developed at lightning speed and in a few months she was already in the growth curve that suited her age.
My guilt to her was, and is, still there every day. Eight years she is, and I haven't been able to clean up yet: I should have been able to take care of her better, my body should have taken care of her, protected her better than it did.
She came to me this morning. I'm quite a bad (ahem) starter in the early morning, so I postpone getting up as long as possible.
She put her little ball on my chest, her little body close to me under the warm blankets.
“You are such a lovely lady. Do you know I'm incredibly proud of you?”
“Isn't that what you are on all of us?”
“Yes, honey, that's right... But you know what? When you were still in Mama's belly, Mama got sick.”
“I know. That's why I was born in the hospital and had to be in such an incubator.”
“That's right, baby. You had to do it on your own five weeks earlier than I would have liked.”
“I did very well, didn't I?”
“Oh, girl, you've done so incredibly well! But Mom would have liked to have done just as well and kept you in her belly for another five weeks.”
“You couldn't help getting sick, could you?”
“No, I don't think so...”
“Then it's all right. I'm very strong, so you did well, Mama.”
The tears couldn't stop themselves... I once again kissed my wise daughter's ball.
“I love you, Mama.”
“Oh, child, I love you so much more.”
On this Monday morning I received forgiveness from my daughter. Forgiveness that I, subconsciously, needed.
This girl, Anieka Catelijne, gave me resignation on this early morning - resignation in eight years of guilt.
Anieka, behave and born in love. ❤
Anieka, she gave me more this morning than she will ever realise: I no longer have to feel guilty and out of love for her I will no longer do so.
Eight years and then so wise and such a big, pure heart... ❤
#yoorsdecember #schoonschip #vergeving #hellp #zwangerschapsvergifiging #zwangerschap #vergiftiging #dochter #mamaendochter #geenschuld #schuldgevoel #liefde
Here are your recommended items...
Here are your milestones...
Choose a gift to support your favorite creator.
Send appreciation in cash choosing your own custom amount to support the creator.
CustomFeature the author on the homepage for a minimum of 1 day.
$15Send a power-up (Heart Magnet, View Magnet, etc.).
Starting from €2Boost the user's post to reach a custom amount of views guaranteed.
Starting from €5Gift a subscription of any plan to the user.
Starting from €5Send cheers to Mamaloetje with a custom tip and make their day
More hearts on posts (24 hours)
€22x Stars for 1 hour
€2Reward the user for their content creation by encouraging to make more posts. They receive extra rewards per heart.
€5More views on posts (48 hours)
€10Level up with one level
€10The campaign will be active until the end date, but your selected goals will be achieved within the delivery timeframe you selected.
Standard duration is 5 days, but you can extend it up to 30 days.
An error has occured. Please contact the Yoors Team.
An error has occurred. Please try again later