It will never be easy! It's a dilemma!
#dealingwithlossandmourning
The topic presented by @vanrupstotvlinder is not an easy topic to deal with due to the dilemmas that may arise.
Of all the aspects she addressed, I am struck by the fact whether or not children can go to the funeral.
In particular, in my family they have the habit of children attending the funeral. All part of an experience my mother had when she lost her dad when she was very young.
My mother says that children must face reality because otherwise it will happen to her that she couldn't be at the funeral.
She waited for her dad to return from the country house. But what he didn't know was that his dad was killed to steal money a few days before father's day.
The family had bought her a pair of shoes to be released that day and my mom was the one who was going to give it to her.
Without a doubt, my grandmother in her pain tried to take care of my mother so that she would not suffer because she was the youngest girl in the house.
My grandmother thought it wise not to tell her anything. But when my mom found out, she says she passed out, got sick with her nerves and was full of hatred towards the person who killed my grandfather.
Certainly, I embraced this same thought of having my children attend anyone's funeral. I don't think I wanted history to repeat itself.
When my children's paternal grandfather died (Isaac was 7 and Sofia was 4). They approached the coffin and the girl asked her dad to lift her up to see her grandfather.
When the burial was, they asked more questions! But, at no time did I notice them sad or restless.
But after years, two of his paternal uncles died a year apart from each other.
This time they saw their father devastated and since they had been close to their uncles, they cried with their father. (Isaac was 10 and my Sofia was 7 years old) and I cried to see them sad.
The next day they were fine and they kept playing. They just came up and said, “Mom, you remember my uncle said this or did that”.
I asked a psychologist friend named Yojaixi Rodríguez about this topic and she explained to me that each person lives this process differently.
She is even living it because her husband a few months ago lost his life to COVID 19.
I tell myself that it is a personal and family decision, that the most important thing is never to lie to children about reality.
She alluded to the fact that children know that something bad is going on! However, everything will depend on age and he said that he can be asked if they want to go or not and what is his decision to respect it.
Here in my country, many parents take children to the funeral and others who don't. So postures and processes are respected.
Lesbian Elena
https://yoo.rs/loss-and-mourning-in-young-people-2-en-1622803013.html?Ysid=178400
#dealingwithlossandmourning , #duel , #ni 3 years, #funeral
- Comments (2)
- Recommended
- Milestones
Here are your recommended items...
Here are your milestones...
