What's up everyone. I am back from my three month hiatus to share a very interesting adventure I had (it's the most I can hope for nowadays 😢) and I can't wait to tell you about it. I hope you love it and also feel free to share your first webinar's experience in the comment section below. Whether you had it on Zoom, Google Meet, Teams or whichever new app they have invented recently.

So, when I first volunteered to host the webinar for the charity organization I volunteer at (spunkGo.com), I really did not expect to be selected. I mean, all I had ever done was be awkward from the first time I enrolled. When our leader agreed to let me host, I was hysterical. I felt like I had just made the worst mistake of my life and I was going to ruin everything for the organization. I really toyed with the idea of backing out but the longer I stalled, the more progress we made, the closer the date got and the harder it was for me to actually back out. Our leader was as supportive as can be given she was like 4,000 miles away and on another continent too. She seemed super chill about the whole thing, but, come on, she'd been doing this longer than me. Ugh.

So there I was, on the week of the webinar. I had gone through every Google result on handling a webinar, ironed my clothes already and even selected the hairstyle I would do by that Friday (the webinar was on a Friday) by that Monday. I even tried some confidence exercises. I can't tell you much about the results ... yikes! I tried cramming the speech, but that didn't seem to work for me so I decided I'd just tilt my phone at the bottom left part of my computer screen the whole time and directly refer to it, shamelessly. I literally wrote the entire speech on my phone's notepad and even clued myself on when to look back at the camera (which I never did by the way), when to exclaim, when to express fascination and so on... you know, like a lot of normal people do... I guess.

Then came Friday. My oh my! I'm pretty sure I came as close to passing out as I ever could in my life. That would have been my first time - fainting. everything went wrong. Suddenly I had a pounding headache on the left side of my head, my hands were shaking unreasonably all day as I went through the motions of getting ready. The meeting had been scheduled for 4pm that day and I had gotten up at 6 am not having slept a wink all night. The anxiety you people, the ANXIETY. So anyways , at about 12pm , I decided to log off social media, because social media literally just adds on to my anxiety every time. I got ready, really took my time with it. washing up, even brushing my teeth for the umpteenth time, then, When I was ready, I sat down in front of my computer screen and logged into my zoom account. It was 3:30pm then. I decided to go back online to chat up my friends to blow out some of the anxiety. I'll never forget the feeling I got when I saw the first message on my chatting app.