I know that these terms can generate confusion, mistake, or are simply the result of total ignorance of their meaning. Here is a short manual, explained in detail.

We are aware that with so many acronyms and so many new concepts we can confuse. Don't worry, it's normal and no one is going to judge you for it. But now is the time for you to learn the difference between each of them, thanks to this short manual that I have created for you.

Three of the terms that are most misleading, but which we consider basic to master in this collective vocabulary, are sex, gender, and sexuality. They may seem the same, even be confused with each other, but they have nothing to do with it.

SEX

When we talk about sex, we are not referring to the physical act - of which it is important to know that it does not only consist of penetration. Any consensual action to give pleasure to oneself or to another person is considered a sexual encounter.

I mean something biological that is based on the chromosome you are born with. If it is XY, your genital will be female; if it is XX it will be male. It may even be the case that you have characteristics of both sexes, so you would be an intersex person.

Easy, right? Now you can never confuse it with gender since it is something completely different.

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Gender

This term has a lot to do with identity. Far from the conception that society has, it does not consist of belonging to the female or male gender depending on whether you have a female organ or a male organ, or even how you feel. It goes further.

It's about your identity and personal expression. How you feel, how you look, and how you behave, according to the social standards of the male or female role. I repeat, it has nothing to do with the sex you are born with.

Now that you know the difference with the term sex, you should know some of the best-known classifications within gender identity:

•    Cis-gender: that person who identifies with the sex that was born.
•    Transgender: that person who does NOT identify with the sex that was born.
•    Fluid gender: that person who does not have a fixed gender identity, but who is flowing between the stereotypes that mark the society of women or men.
•    Non-binary gender: that person who does not identify himself within the gender binary established by society, i. e., that of man or woman.
•    Queer: that person who does not accept the norms established by society about sex and gender, so they are not pigeonholed into an identity.

Of course, everything previously mentioned has no relation to sexuality, the third and last concept that I will develop.

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Sexuality

Sexual orientation is also something biological, something you are born with, and that no one can make you change (only yourself). All guidelines are valid and none should be considered more normal or ordinary than another. Because, basically, it consists of what you like, attracts you, and excites you. And this cannot be controlled.

As in gender identity, there are also different types of sexuality. I am not going to define for you what heterosexuality, homosexuality, or bisexuality means, because you already know it by heart. I will focus on others less known, but just as present in society.

•    Pansexual: those people who are attracted to others, regardless of their gender or sex. Come to the person, not the woman or the man, for example.
•    Asexual: those people who do NOT feel any type of sexual attraction to any sex or gender, or interest in having sexual relations with others or oneself, or that if they do so it is to a lesser extent.
•    Heteroflexible: a person who is primarily attracted to the opposite sex, but has or does not rule out a future interest in people of the same sex.
•    Demisexual: that person who is only attracted to another if there is a sentimental/romantic union between them.

Now that you know the difference between sex, gender, sexuality, and everything that surrounds them, it is time to transmit it to those who do not, to avoid unnecessary mistakes or that may generate conflict.

So, now, let’s check when the terms Sex and Gender were born.

When Did The Difference Between Sex and Gender Arise?

Between 1955 and 1957, John Money (a New Zealand psychologist, sexologist, and author known for his research into sexual identity and biology of gender and his conduct towards vulnerable patients) was the one who first proposed the concepts between sex and gender. In doing so, he has provided solid arguments explaining their differences.

Another important figure in psychology was Rhoda Unger, stating in 1979 that gender was more of a cultural issue and sex should be taken from the biological point of view. Both professionals were two important figures who gave the initiative, according to their studies, to talk about sex and gender as two different concepts. However, today, the terms sex and gender are still used synonymously. This topic is currently being very much discussed with more force although it is not a recent topic.

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Why is The Difference Between Sex and Gender Important?

Today, progress can be seen with regard to these terms, although there is still a part of society that resists thinking differently.

There are many people who must hide their gender or sexual identity for fear of what they will say, social stigma can be very strong in some cases, for example, due to work, religious issues, etc. Due to this, there is a high rate of depression and even suicide among members of the LGBTQIA + community since they feel excluded.

Discriminatory acts towards the perception of gender violate human rights, to the point that some episodes end in violence. In short, knowing the difference between sex and gender is important to the extent that discrimination and inequity are counteracted.

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